Tighten Down With Christ

Today my wife and I had two car seats installed at the Greer Fire Department in preparation for the arrival of Anna Grace coming sometime within the next two weeks. As one of the firemen was installing the base in the back of my jeep I asked what was the most common mistake he see’s with self installed car seats. He said most are installed by individuals, which turn out to be to loose and then went on to tell me this story:

“I pulled a call the other day where a woman was blindsided and hit from the side. The impact sent her child locked in the car seat all the way across the car and the child’s head hit the other side window. The seat belt holding the car seat was not tight enough.”

As I was driving home I thought this sounds like a good analogy with the way most people are in their faith with God. People have the tendency to just tighten up their relationship with God enough to make them feel safe. Attend church sometimes; give once to twice a year if that much, read God’s word maybe a few times a year, pray only when things get really bad or maybe just pray over dinner. They tighten Christ around themselves just enough to feel safe but leave the belt of life just loose enough to not have Him controlling them completely.

Then when life produces some kind of crash they fly across the car of life and smack their head against the realities of this world. They become bewildered and shaken up, sometimes not knowing how they will survive the trial they find themselves in.

Let me encourage you today to allow Jesus Christ to buckle you down tight. Seek Him with all your might while He might be found. Ask God to tighten your life seat belt by enlightening the eyes of your heart and renewing your minds to His overarching sovereignty and control in all things. Ask God to reveal sin, grant repentance and increase faith in your lives. He is faithful and will not disappoint those who seek Him in humility.

I’m no stranger in understanding the need to have a tight seat belt in this life. With Anna Grace’s possible heart issues, I take comfort in knowing that my seat belt is God. Although the road may get rough and I can feel the every bump, I’m securely planted and rooted in my Savior who is the Christ and His name is Jesus. May He receive the glory that is due to Him and Him only through my trials and sufferings.

Anna Grace - December 14

Today was a very good appointment with Dr. G. Anna Grace's heartbeart was strong & steady at 158 BPM. My amniotic fluid looked good and the fluid on her abdomen has NOT increased (Praise God)! While I was there Anna Grace was practicing breathing - apparently this is a normal thing babies at this age do in-utero and it means that she is being a "normal" baby :) She was also so very active that the ultrasound tech could hardly get the pictures that she needed - also a very good sign that she is doing well today. I also had the privilage of looking at her face today which I have to brag on...... she has the chubbiest little cheeks you have ever seen AND we also noticed that she has some little fat rolls on her legs. What joy it brought to me that I just had to share it with you too!!!!

So... things went SO well at today's visit that I don't have to go back to see Dr. G again until Thursday - unless of course I notice a decrease in her movement between now & then.

There is still much to be in prayer over.... that her little heart will continue to sustain her, that the fluid on her abdomen will remain as it is or decrease, that she will continue to gain weight and strength, that she will be able to remain in my womb until December 30. There is also SO MUCH to be praising God for.... truly everything about today's visit was an answered prayer. Thank you all for continuing to be faithful to pray for our sweet Anna Grace!

Anna Grace - December 11

Today's doctor visit was a good one. The ultrasound showed that Anna Grace still has fluid on her abdomen, but that is does not appear to have increased - which is a good sign that her heart is holding steady. On a positive note, my amniotic fluid has increased (praise God)! Dr. G gave us the option of going down to Charleston today to have the doctor's there look at Anna Grace to determine if she needed to go ahead & be delivered or not. He said that most likely what would occur if we did that is that they would want to watch her & do another ultrasound on Monday to determine if she needed to be delivered. So, Brian & I decided to stay in town & we will go back to Greenville on Monday to see Dr. G for another ultrasound and then make a determination at that time about going to Charleston for delivery on Monday. He did caution us that if Anna Grace's movements decreased at all over the weekend that I am to go to the hospital in Greenville - so please join us in praying that she remains an active little girl throughout the weekend and we can go see Dr. G in Greenville on Monday as planned.

Some other pretty amazing things occured while we were at our visit with Dr. G this morning. The sweet nurse who usually sees me was there again today & performed my ultrasound as usual. During our time together today, Brian was able to share his testimony with her as well as share the Gospel with her. She began to cry as Brian shared how the Lord saved Him and I of course being pregnant began to cry too. She gave us both a hug and left the room. Then Dr. G came in and asked why we were making his staff cry :) Brian told Dr. G that he was sharing with her how God saved him. At that point Brian thanked Dr. G for waiving our fee for his services (which he has done for our last three appointments) and Dr. G said that this was his ministry and that he was glad to do it. Brian asked Dr. G if he could pray for him and he said yes, so the three of us prayed together in Dr. G's office. Friends, we ask you to please join us in praying for Dr. G and his office - they have truly been a blessing to us - certainly not a coincidence - but a blessing from our sweet Savior :)

Also, on another note - we had some roofers come to the house yesterday to patch our leaky roof. They feel pretty sure that they were able to fix the leaks (at least for the time being). They did not charge us for their services. We didn't share with them our situation with Anna Grace so we're not really sure why they didn't charge us for their services, but we are thankful for their generosity. If anyone needs a roofer we have one to recommend :)

One more blessing to share with everyone.... Crossbridge Ministries is a ministry in Charleston who we met with when we were there in September. They basically minister to families who have sick children/family members at MUSC and are in Charleston from out-of-town. They become your friends & church away from home while you are away from home. They have been faithful to pray for us and for Anna Grace since they found out about our story. I e-mailed them yesterday to let them know that we might be heading to Charleston earlier than expected as well as to let them know the location of the townhome where we will be staying while we are in Charleston. The director from Crossbridge e-mailed me back & told me that that we would be virtually across the street from each other. Truly, that is a blessing and again, not a coincidence. How wonderful to have a Christian support system whlie we are going to be away from home.

So.... we have all our bags packed and I suppose we will just keep them packed as we don't know when we will be heading down to Charleston. But for the time being we are enjoying being home together and our little girl has a few more days of comfort in my womb. Z will be home from his Grandparents in the morning so Brian & I are going to have a quiet evening together tonight.

Anna Grace - December 9

Just got home from the Maternal Fetal doctor appointment. Dr. G said that my amniotic fluid has stayed steady, which is a huge PRAISE. However, he noticed that Anna Grace has fluid build up in her abdomen. He said that this is an indication that her heart is failing and is unable to pump the fluid through her body. He said that he wanted to see me again on Friday morning to look at the fluid in her abdomen. If it has increased he's going to send me down to Chalreston for delivery. There is some concern about her lung development because she is only 36 weeks along, but there is not enough amniotic fluid to do an amniocentesis to check her lung development. So, basically, if there is increased fluid in her abdomen on Friday she is going to have to be delivered whether her lungs are developed or not becase it means her heart is failing. He also said that if I noticed a decrease in her movement today or tomorrow to come right into the office to be checked.

So, please be praying that Anna Grace's little heart can sustain her for a little while longer so that she can remain in my womb as long as possible. Also, please pray for discernment for me - for me to be able to tell if there is decrease in activity and I need to go ahead & go to the doctor. Please pray for Zachary to handle all of these changes well because things could change for him very quickly. Please pray for strength for my husband Brian - being the leader of family is a huge responsibility. Also, not quite as big, but certainly something to be prying for.... with all of this rain we've had we have had several roof leaks so we really need a roofer to come and at least fix these leaks in our roof pretty quickly so that we don't come home to a HUGE mess.

Things I am thankful for.... for Dr. G who cares so much about Anna Grace, for Mrs. L who is so faithful to keep Z for us, for my husband who I can not imagine going through without his love & support and most importantly - for our Lord who promises to "strengthen and help me and uphold me in His righteous right hand".

Anna Grace - December 4

We had an appointment with the Maternal Fetal doctor in Greenville on Friday (Dec 4). Our appointment was early (8:30) so we had an early morning of dropping off Z with Mrs. L to get to Greenville on time.

Let me just stop for a moment here & say THANK YOU to Mrs. L for being SO FAITHFUL to keep Z for us during our many doctor appointments. She never says "no", although there are plenty of times I'm sure she's had to rearrange her schedule to accomodate us. She is truly a blessing to our family and Z just LOVES going to her house :)

So... as Brian & I are sitting in the waiting room of the Maternal Fetal doctor's office in walks Anna Grace's Cardiologist. We did not have an appointment with him and this is not his office. When I saw him I said "Wow, I didn't expect to get to see you today" to which he replied "I'm just here to see you for a social visit". Now, for those of you who may not know, we don't have Maternity Insurance so, if we had an appointment with the Cardiologist the "office" would have had to charge us, so this sweet doctor took time away from his day to come see us away from his office for a "social" visit. So, they called us back & we had our ultrasound of our little Anna Grace. She looked great and appears to be growing normally (with the exception of her heart). She weighs in at a whopping 6 pounds 3 ounces (PRASIE GOD) and was a very active little wiggle worm. We were also blessed to have been able to just look at her little face in 4D. It's amazing technology and we were able to see even the most minor little details of her face. She has chubby little cheeks and a dimple on her chin and the cutest little pouty lips you've ever seen. The also has fat little arms & fingers. So basically I'm saying that she is SUPER CUTE!!!!!! It was a very sweet time to just look at her so peaceful, perfectly content in my womb :)

After all the "pictures" the Cardiologist came in for our "social" visit which he informed us that her heart looked the same (Hypoplastic Right Heart Syndrome) so we can still expect to deliver her in Charleston & she will still be having her first surgery most likely when she is about 2 days old. He also wanted to be sure that we knew how things would "play out" once she was born. She'll have to be put on a ventilator immediately and will have a feeding tube inserted as well as other "lines" run. She will be in the Pediatric ICU - unless there is no room there - in which case she will be in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. They will start doing testing on her immediately once she is out of the womb to confirm the findings of her "in womb" echocardiograms. Then the surgeons will come up with her specific "surgery game plan". It's all going to be pretty quick. At the conculsion of our meeting with the Cardiologist, Dr. R, he prayed for us and for Anna Grace. We won't see Dr. R again until after Anna Grace is home from Charleston. He will be her "regular" cardiologist in Greenville. I am truly thankful that God brought us to Dr. R. He has certainly ministered to our family and we are grateful that he will be Anna Grace's doctor.

After we met with Dr. R - then we met with the Maternal Fetal dcotor, Dr. G. He told us that my amniotic fluid is low and that he wants to monitor it closely. He said if it drops below a certain point he will go ahead & send us to Charleston to have Anna Grace delivered early. So there is a possibility that she will be born BEFORE December 30th. Please contunite to pray with us that this does not hapen and that she can be born on December 30 as scheduled. As uncomfortable as these last few weeks of pregnancy are, I really want my little one to get as big & strong as she can be before she has her first surgery. Dr. G said that everything else about her looks great and normal. Dr. G was also very generous with us and did not charge us for his visit on Friday. It truly is a testimony of how God is taking care of all these details for us through this journey. Thank you Lord :)

So.... as of today, I am trying not to be anxious, although I have to admit it is difficult for me. She's going to be here very soon and we don't know what her future holds. We are TRUSTING GOD that whatever plan He has for our family is perfect. We are also TRUSTING GOD that He will give us the strength to make it through each day of this journey. Thank you friends for continuing to pray for us & encourage us & love on us. You will NEVER KNOW how much it means.

Bread of Life is the Word of Life that leads to Eternal Life

There are some text in the bible that are just plain tough to wrap our minds around, but nevertheless they are still God’s inspired written word, and they do need to be dealt with if we are to grow in the Lord and help others grow as well. John chapter 6 has some of these texts. I encourage you to listen to John Piper preach and try to deal with these text as he moves his church through the Gospel of John.

Unfortunately, to really get up to speed you need to listen to November 22nd's message (50 minutes), and then to his most recent message on November 29 (50 minutes)

I hope you enjoy!

I Weep Not For Myself

I’m currently reading A Pilgrim Who Made Progress – The Life Story of John Bunyan Author of the Pilgrim’s Progress by William Deal. Mr. Bunyan was put in jail for preaching without a license in 1660 and one year later his wife Elizabeth Bunyan went before the judges to argue for her husband’s release. Here is a small excerpt from the book:

Elizabeth, now quiet upset, replied (to Judge Twisden), “He preaches nothing but the Word of God!”

At this, Twisden, white with rage shouted, “He preach the word of God! He runneth up and down the country and doth harm too many people!”

Standing firmly, Elizabeth looked at him with tender eyes and replied, “No, my Lord, it is not so; God has owned him and done much good by him.”

Twisden replied, “God! His (Bunyan’s) doctrine is the doctrine of the devil!”

Elizabeth standing calmly replied, “My Lord, when the Righteous Judge shall appear, it will be known that his doctrine is not the doctrine of the devil!”

Elizabeth weeping went on, “I weep not for myself, nor for John Bunyan; our case is in God’s hands. I weep to think of what a sad day it will be when you poor creatures who have so treated him today shall stand before the Judge of the universe to give an account of your deeds!”

John Bunyan was released from prison 11 years later. One main reason he stayed in prison so long I believe is because of comments like this:

John Bunyan being led away by the bailiffs turned and shouted to the justices, “If I were out of jail today, I would preach the Gospel tomorrow!” John did continue to preach from the jail to prisoners and some outsiders each Sunday; So much for silencing God’s Word which will never happen.

Lord thank you for John and Elizabeth Bunyan!